Happy Birthday

Happy birthday

Happy birthday to you

Happy birthday

Happy birthday to you

Well, it's time to celebrate your birthday, it happens every year

We'll eat a lot of broccoli and drink a lot of beer

You should be good and happy that there's something you can eat

A million people every day are starving in the street

Your daddy's in the gutter with the wretched and the poor

Your mama's in the kitchen with a can of Cycle Four

There's garbage in the water

There's poison in the sky

I guess it won't be long before we're all gonna die

Happy birthday

Happy birthday to you

Happy birthday

Happy birthday to you

Well, what's the matter little friend, you think this party is the pits

Enjoy it while you can, we'll soon be blown to bits

The monkeys in the pentagon are gonna cook our goose

Their finger's on the button, all they need it an excuse

It doesn't take a military genius to see

We'll all be crispy critters after World War III

There's nowhere you can run to, nowhere you can hide

When they drop the big one, we all get fried

(Come on boys and girls, sing along, ok?)

Happy birthday

Happy birthday to you

Happy birthday

Happy birthday to you

wow! (background screaming, sound effect)

Well there's a punk in the alley and he's looking for a fight

There's an Arab on the corner buying everything in sight

There's a mother in the ghetto with another mouth to feed

Seems that everywhere you look today there's misery and greed

I guess you know the Earth is gonna crash into the sun

But that's no reason why we shouldn't have a little fun

So if you think it's scary, if it's more than you can take

Just blow out the candles and have a piece of cake

Happy birthday

Happy birthday to you

Happy birthday

Happy birthday to you

wow!

Happy birthday

Happy birthday to you

Happy birthday

Happy birthday to you

(Happy Birthday!)

And a pinch to grow an inch!

Once a year we celebrate,

With stupid hats and plastic plates,

The fact that you were able to make

The trip around the sun.

And the whole gang gathers round,

And gifts and laughter do abound.

And we let out a joyful sound

And sing that stupid song.

Happy birthday!

Now you're one year older.

Happy birthday!

Your life still isn't over.

Happy birthday!

You did not accomplish much.

But you didn't die this year, I guess that's good enough.

So let's drink to your fading health,

And hope you don't remind yourself,

Your chance of finding fame and wealth,

Decrease with every year.

Cause if you feel you're doing laps,

And eating food and taking naps,

And hoping that someday perhaps

Your life may hold some cheer.

Happy birthday!

What have you done that matters?

Happy birthday!

You're starting to get fatter.

Happy birthday!

It's downhill from now on.

Try not to remind yourself your best years are all gone.

If cryogenics were all free,

Then you could live like Walt Disney.

And live for all eternity,

inside a block of ice.

But instead your time is set.

This is the only life you get.

And though it hasn't ended yet,

Sometimes you wish it might.

Happy birthday!

You wish you had more money.

Happy birthday!

Your life s so sad it s funny.

Happy birthday!

How much more can you take?

But your friends are hungry, so just cut the stupid cake.

Happy birthday!

Happy birthday!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Dear [names]